- If you are the person who has a desk reference, a dictionary, and a medical terminology dictationary at your desk but you still have to ask someone about how to spell a word because you're too lazy to look it up, you irritate me.
- If you make my friend cry, you irritate me.
- If you are the maker of an electronic gadget that I love and breaks within a month, you irritate me.
- If you are the freaking printer that runs out of paper just before printing the last goddamn page, you irritate me.
- If you are a hypochondriac germaphobe who can't stop talking about swine flu, you irritate me.
- If you are the guy driving that silver van who cut me off just to get to the red light faster than me today, you irritate me, too.
- If you're the only cashier at the front of the store, you irritate me on principle.
- If you work at the pharmacy that cancelled my prescription instead of filling it, for reasons as yet unknown, you irritate me by association.
- If you owe me money, which you know you do, and you haven't sent it yet, you irritate the shit out of me because that's just wrong.
- If you're too chicken to agree with me publicly but make a big to-do about agreeing with me in private where nobody can see, you irritate me.
- If you cannot take constructive criticism about something I am trained to do (and you are not yet) without getting an attitude, you irritate me.
I'm irritated today; can you tell?
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