Tuesday, October 27, 2009

OMG Really?

So. I was browsing around a little bit, not really aiming for anything, when I found this.


Obesogens? Are we really to the point where we're coming up with names for our fat hate now? This goes right in line with the insurance company denying a fat baby coverage last week because he was, say it with me now, a fat baby. Now we're trying to figure out why babies are fat. In the beginning of the article, the writer touts how babies shouldn't be fat at all because they don't eat buttered-down popcorn. So the answer must be obesogens!


Come on, really. I will be the first one to tell you that stuffing that large popcorn with butter down into your belly all by yourself really may not make you feel that great - but is it the sole reason you're a fat guy? Not so much. And I will be the first one to tell you that a little forward momentum will make a girl feel better in the long run, but is a lack of exercise the sole reason you have "couch potatofication?" Not likely. People like butter. People don't always like exercise. It is not the sole reason we're fat.

Some people are just fat.

Chew on that for a while, just if you will. But while you do, let's explore this: We're a fat species because we're evolving.

That's right. I said it. We've evolved into fat people. We're the high class now, poncho!

Alright, so follow me on this: As humans evolved, we had to hunt, gather, and / or kill our food, right? So there were weeks, possibly months of lean times. As we grew into a culture, our combining food skills grew and there was less of the lean times. Even during our great depression, people were farming. Yes, there wasn't a lot to go around, but we weren't all spread out killing one beastie at a time.

We have evolved into a consumer society, which means that somebody else does the slaughtering of the beasties for us. When we're hungry, food is right there for our taking; and even at poverty level, there is food. We're not a lean species any more. But most people can't accept that. We have to blame the fat on SOMETHINGOMG!

So, now we have fat-causing chemicals making our babies fat. Like tiny little ZOMGs popping into our children and fattening them out.

Seriously, please look past the obesogens and think for yourself. Fifty years ago, if you had a fat baby, people would say he / she was cute. Now, he's just a fat baby with no insurance.

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

I Can Hear The Bells

OK - I told you (my two whole readers...?) that I would write about Hairspray today, and I am a fish of my word.

First, I'll start with the stuff I didn't like about it; and then, we'll get to why it is important to me right now.

For starters, I really would have liked it better if they got an actual fat-and-fabulous actress to play Edna. To be honest, I thought John Travolta as a chick was pretty funny; but the more I see it (on permanent loop in my dvd player right now), I wish they'd have gone with a woman. A fat woman. A fabulous woman. Like they did for Maybelle - Queen Latifah? Big, blonde, and beautiful!

Ok second, the powers that be on this movie portray this: Fat girls are fat because they can't stop eating. Tracy has candy bars snuck under her pillow. Edna can't say no to some braised chicken or cornbread. It smacks of "you're fat because you can't stop eating." And even though it is a work of fiction, I'd have liked it if they left out the little candybars. Let's have a fat girl be fat just because she is. We don't need to know the reason why.

Ok, so those are my two downers. On the whole, though, I am in love with this movie. Wanna know why? THE FAT GIRL WINS. Let's put all of the integration aside for a moment (even though woo!) and just make it about that. The fat girl wins in a big way. Hairspray is on its second or third incarnation, and I think this one is the best yet because Tracy Turnblatt is unashamed of her difference, her fat. Throughout the whole movie, she's dancing, singing, and gyrating all over the place because she's OK in her fat. And I love that. And at the end? Everybody's in on the fat show, and I loved it. There are some really, really good moments in this movie aimed directly at anybody who is different from the norm. You're different, too? Hey, that's ok! That is the theme for the entire movie, and it really got me. Makes a fat girl wanna win, too. :)

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Current Faves

10 current favorite things:

  1. Just My Size blue jeans, size 18, dark wash (I prefer boot cut over classic, but the classics fit well also.)
  2. Butterfly Flower body spray and lotion from Bath and Body Works
  3. www.paperbackswap.com
  4. Health at Every Size by Linda Bacon
  5. The movie Hairspray
  6. Sam's Choice Clearly American Water, Mediterranean Orange
  7. Lucinda Darkly by Sunny
  8. Careless Whispers by Seether (cover of Wham)
  9. Fat Fu (to be found in my blogroll)
  10. Epona Marie (always a favorite)

Tomorrow, we'll talk about why I think Hairspray is so important to a fat girl. :)

Monday, October 19, 2009

Anti-Fat Talk Week

I'm digging the fat-o-sphere, yo.

Ok, so I was all over the fat-o-sphere today; and as usual, the things I needed to see / comprehend the most jumped all out at me. Kate Harding's "don't talk shit about yourself" was number one on today's blow-your-mind-o-rama.

But I also found out that this week is Anti-Fat-Talk Week.

So, can we all pledge to not talk shit about ourselves this week?

You know we can. *shake-a shake-a*

(Two posts in one day? Woo!)

Joy Fit and the New Mentality

Every week, I read the Joy Fit story on MSNBC.com. Really, I can't tell you why because I've no idea why I keep reading it. But I do. Today's story struck me hard - but not in the way they meant it to be striking. Here's what the woman said:

"I felt like my worth as a person was directly attached to my size."

No shit, right? This was another mental ninja-bomb that just went off in my head, and here we are.

For as long as I can remember, I've felt as though my self-worth was correlated to my size. If my size went down, I was worth more. If my size went up, I was worth less. If someone commented on my size, it meant that they could see how "bad" I had been. But something is unfurling in my brain, you guys. Something is being uncovered, and it is smashing all of those old feelings to bits.

Because you see, I wasn't being bad. I wasn't being a naughty chub snacking on everything I could get my hands on. I DID put back a 12-pack of cupcakes for Valentine's day all by myself, but I realized that this was behavior stemming from a mental state that has seen been leveled. I was covering up something - not being "bad." There was no criminal behavior involved. There was no moral corruption. My behavior, although perhaps not particularly helpful to my overall mental state, was not wrong or right. It just was.

I just am.

If I'm going to accept my body and all of its conundrums, I have to accept its size, too. It just is the way it is. I have stubby toes. That's just the way it is. I have rheumatoid arthritis and fibromyalgia. That's just the way it is. I'm bipolar with PTSD. That's just the way it is. And I'm a size 18/20. That's just the way it is. There's nothing "wrong" CLEARLY with any of these things. They just are.

I won't go so far as to say I'm comfortable in my body now because me and my body are still working on the process together. But my mind gets it. My mind understands that fat is not moral. It just is. My mind understands that eating a quarter-pounder with cheese is not wrong. It just is. My mind is beginning to open doors for the rest of me, and I feel lighter - no pun intended. I feel less weighed down by this notion that I'm a bad girl for being a big girl.

I'm beginning to understand - mentally, emotionally, and spiritually - that my self-worth is not correlated to my size. And it is a wonderful thing.

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

HAES: The plethora of information

HAES is still rocking my world, big time. I'm actually starting to seek it out now...read more about it than I have been. It is amazing to me how much is out there.

Seriously, if you haven't already, google you some HAES and see how much you find. It is amazing.

The most amazing thing, though, is this: There are a lot of people out there just like me. People struggling to learn to love their bodies. People ready for all of the propaganda to just quit it and leave me alone. I'm ready to love me the way I am now. I'm so ready to learn how to do that. So are a lot of other people, it seems.

For right now, I'm off to buy a book! A HAES book, no less! WOO!

Sunday, October 11, 2009


So. It snowed in Iowa yesterday. Fat, stick-to-your-window snow.

Bah humbug.

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

RTT: The return

I've been absent from RTT for a while; so, I don't know if I will be able to think of anything?

My god-daughter was just released from the hospital, and I'm so incredibly happy that she is ok. She was admitted for mental stabilization (something I almost had to do this year), and she began a new medication formula, which should help. She's making better choices towards her health now, and I'm so proud of her for doing what she had to do to make it better. (She's 18. I would have been terrified.)

Hungry Hobo = El Fabuloso

I recently began foraging into a new spiritual place, and I'm psyched about it but a little scared, too. A new goddess has been pushing into my brain, and it sometimes takes up a lot of mental energy just to keep up. I've been researching all day, though, and I feel pretty connected in this place now. I still have to write my body ritual, but I think that will come later tonight. I'm looking to perform it on the next new moon (usually when my body image is at its lowest); so, I still have plenty of time.

I need to have my eyebrows waxed.

OMG! I bought argyle socks! I heart the argyle!

It is kind of funny when people from your past make themselves known in your current life. Sometimes, you expect them to be the same, and they are different. But sometimes, you expect them to be different, and they are exactly the same.

For more random fun, go visit Keely. (*points to blogroll*)